This is My Year

I am going to love myself. I am going to go on the interview. I am going to get the job. I am going to fall in love. I am going to show love towards my family. I am going to hang out with my friends. I am going to save my money. I am going to laugh until I can’t breath. I am going to be healthy. I am going to walk for miles. I am going to read that book. I am going to be polite. I am going to see that show. I am going to get organize. I am going to get rid of that negativity. I am going to see what I am worth. I am going to wear that red, black, or purple lipstick. I am going to give to that charity. I am going to do what I want to do. I am going to respect people who respect me. I am going to let go of the past. I am going to let go of the negative people. I am going to be more positive.
2017 is my year. 

Don’t Live in the Past

 Life has been rather difficult for me the last year. Many may not understand but I basically had a crisis. I can’t call it a midlife crisis but it was very similar. Working many part time jobs, gaining weight, drinking a lot, and thinking people who were apart of your life really where not the best for you or ran away when times got rough.

 Life is a challenge and it is not supposed to be easy. However, when one is stressed out it is rather difficult to focus. I have been dealin with a lot of good and bad stress lately. I have been finding that food is the only comfort I get. I find myself not knowing when to stop. 

 I also over think a lot. It is a lot of negative thinking because I feel that the last year I have become a failure. Working really hard (and not being promoted or advancing), failed relationships, people getting mad at me due to feeling over whelmed and stressed, gaining weight, and just not feeling satisfied in life. 

 Every week I tell myself that things will change. Honesty, the motivation is not there. I can’t stop playing the past in my head. I feel like I have done a lot of wrong in my life. Wish I could fix everything. I can’t.

  So again..if I seem difficult or unbearable..please be patient. If not, don’t be in my life. I can’t handle anymore stress.
-Jackie

2017 will be my Year!

First, thank you everyone for the support the last few days. You’re all truly amazing! My blog blew up and I got the most views EVER. I am blessed to have many supporters.

 I didn’t sleep well last night but I am moving on. I have cried too much the last three days. Screw this behavior. I have plans for 2017. I have plans for my future. Things don’t always go the way as planned. That does not mean the world ends. I am working on myself. I am taking medicine to help me through difficult times. I am not a victim. I am a fighter.


Here is to 2017. Here is to being healthy and happy with who you are.

-Jackie

Get Out of This Rut

Sometimes..life does not go the way you thought it would go. Sometimes you have timelines and ideas but you soon realize they were only a concept. You thought you were happy but in the long run you realize nothing has changed and you have to make a change or else you will be unhappy. Life is too short to be unhappy.

 Anyway, the last couple months I was filled with stress and emotions. I still feel some of this but things are getting better. In the last couple of months I have gained weight, snacked my life away, and have been drinking a lot.

My Timehop actually motivated me this morning. 


This side by side motivated me because I do not want to be the person on the left hand side. I was so unhealthy on the left hand side. I had not confidence because I could not wear the clothes I wanted. I ate what I want and drank what I wanted..but I was slowly killing myself. I was 232 lbs.

   I am afraid I will go back to this path. I am falling into old habits hard. I am not working out, I am drinking a lot (even by myself) and I am snacking on foods like sweets and chips. I am unhappy..so enough is enough.


 I decided to put on workout clothes and hit the gym. Normally, the last couple of month; I would have just sat at home on a day off. I decided to put on my new sneakers and workout tank top and go to the gym.


It was rough go do this machine for a hour. I was not used to it, but I did it. I also decided to use weighs today too.


 I was in a better mood after working out today. I have been feeling moody and foggy lately but working out put me in a better mood.

 What I need to do is treat the gym like it is my job. I need to make a schedule and stick to it. If I do not clock in, then I need to act like I am got to get fired. I need to change things with working out.

 I need to change things with snacking. I am snacking of things that are normal but then I will go through the fridge and try to eat things that shouldn’t be smacked on like bread or cheese.

 I also have been drinking a lot. I used to be a social drinker but now I find myself drinking alone. This is not healthy. I used to not drink at home either. This needs to stop.

I am going to change. This has been going on for too long. I need to be healthy again.
-Jackie

Top 100 Weight Loss Blogs on Diet to Go


 I was just contacted by Diet to Go and was informed that they placed my blog on the “Top 100 Weight Loss Blog” list that they created. It is truly a honor to be mentioned in a list like this. I am grateful that Diet to Go decided to create a list of bloggers who may not be well known. I was looking at the list and all of these people share the same thing with me. We are trying to lose weight, live happy lives, and trying to inform and support others who maybe struggling.


What is really cool is Diet to Go has found 100 bloggers and I am in the top ten. Talk about a ego boost. 

Take a look at Diet to Go and the list they have created.

Sorry that I have been out of sorts and not really updating. The end of the semester was a killer. I am almost done grades. Phew!
Thank you, Diet to Go! You guys are awesome for creating this list! We need more sites like this to inspire everyday people like myself to feel connected with a issue many struggle with.

-Jackie

Four Years Ago and Now

  
 When this picture was taken of me four years ago I had no self confidence. I hated how my arms looked in this picture. I thought if I wore my glasses I would have not look glamorous..so I went the whole day blind. I was not comfortable in my own skin.

 A lot has changed now. This picture was taken last night and I looked good! I did not care what others though about me. I showed my arms with pride and wore my glasses to full nerd potential. Even though I lost weight and gained some back I am still comfortable in my skin. I do not feel fat. I feel strong.

 Strong is the word for both physically and mentally. When you look under the clothes I do have a tiny six back happening. It is tiny. My legs are strong from spin class. My arms are able to knock you out with my fists. I am strong physically.

 Mentally I am strong because I don’t care what people say about me. Don’t like my arms? I don’t care. Don’t like I am wearing glasses? I need them to see and they are not a fashion statement for you. I can still wear makeup and look glamorous with them on. 

I am learning two things at the age of twenty-seven.

1.) Who cares what others think? I am not here on earth to please every single one of you. Only the people who matter.

2.) Strong is the new skinny.

-Jackie